ROUGH WEEK MENTALLY links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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Exercise total for 5 days.

0 Curls w/ 20 pound dumb bells

0 Shoulder raises/Chest presses w/ 10 pound dumb bells

250 Crunches

250 Leg lifts

100 Squats

140 Back flexes

0 hour of yoga over 0 days


I forgot to take my night time pills Monday night.  I didn’t sleep at all until 4:30 am after I took my pills.  I didn’t exercise the rest of the week.  That exercise total is what I did on Monday.

That night of not sleeping threw me off of my routine.  My body & mind just yelled at me “NO, IT’S TIME TO JUST STOP FOR THIS WEEK & RELAX”.  Great, I don’t really know how to relax?  I should have seen this coming.  I knew I’d need to rest at some point & I was hoping the Labour Day weekend would do it for me but I guess my energy ran out before the long weekend.  I guess that’s also a perk for me?  I can shut it down when I need to, doesn’t mean that I like to.  Feels more like a waste of a week.

Personally, I’m just tired.  Even watching Blue Jay baseball (I watch as much of it as possible every year) feels like a chore since I really don’t watch TV.  I exercise 5 days a week, I play a TON of guitar & I watch a little TV.  You factor in eating, showering, random household stuff, & sleeping, that’s a typical 24 hours for me & sleeping is only about 6-7 hours of it.

I don’t know if I’m tired or ready to embrace getting older?  I just want to kick back grab a guitar & not think about anything for a while.  Time to do nothing at all.  I already feel like I’m so far behind everyone but I’m just tired of trying to catch up to everyone.  I’m not about to give up, I just need/needed a short break.  I may not make a lot of money but I still feel as though I need to earn that disability check.

As for my guitar being delayed, it really wasn’t a downer for me.  I chose to put a positive spin on it.  Sure I ordered it in January.  I also chose to go with a fancy PRS guitar, since I researched it & the company so much.  Knowing that part of the delay was due to them looking for a blemish free piece of wood for the top of the body on the guitar is exactly the reason I wanted a PRS.  Yep it’s not cheap & some people might think that’s a waste of money, but the fact that they’re looking for a nice piece of wood that will be ¼” thick when all is said & done, that tells me that they’re likely quite particular about everything else going into that guitar, which was in the research I did.

S2 Custom 22 Semi-Hollow Body Guitar w/Gig Bag - McCarty Sunburst

That guitar has been saved for financially & if everything goes according to plan I’ll be placing an order for a different PRS S2 guitar in February.  I know already that I don’t want anything else in the meantime or after I upgrade my amplifier.  I’m keeping it simple.  If it turns out that were in a pinch financially, that’s where any & all funds go to.  Less stuff for me means less stuff can go wrong or needs repair.  I should mention that Kim’s fine with me getting the amplifier now.  Now that I know PRS are backed up 10-12 months due to Covid and that there is a 90-180 day delay regardless.  I’ll put down the 10% to order it in February & hope to get the guitar in December or in early 2022.

Yeah that exact model & colour to be ordered in February hopefully.  Then save for this amplifier & footswitch.

Once I’m done with those purchases, I’m done with big purchases for a LONG time!  I researched the crap out of that specific PRS guitar & the amplifier.  The guitar is more expensive & it’ll come first.

You can call me whatever you want.  I’m OK with my progress & it’ll continue.  I get to have some fun along the way & for me that’s being in familiar surroundings & playing guitar.  Other than purchasing music & guitar related maintenance stuff, I don’t spend money & I don’t make a lot of money.  I’ve chosen 7 or 8 bands that I’ll purchase CD recordings of, 5 or 6 bands I’ll buy on iTunes, stream a lot of other stuff, I’ve given up on going to live shows other than a handfull of groups that might be here or in the 2 neighboring provinces, we cutback on our cable & streaming services, we don’t go out for any meals & somehow we’ll still be in a tight spot financially in the future.  Oh well, so are a lot of other people.

I went all “Marie Kondo” on my stuff & realized I don’t really need all of this stuff now.  Family, friends, & guitars are a part of my daily life & happiness.

If I’m destined to be a hermit, so be it…I might as well enjoy it!  More than anything, I want to do the right thing by staying out of the way for other people, & not bother anyone.  Someone needs help, I’ll do what I can.  I don’t want much & I don’t think I have a lot to give, if you think I do, I’ll look for it.

I’m not financially rich by any means, so I’ll live within my limits, be fine with that, & carry on.  Will I ever walk again?  I have no idea, it seems as though any strength/muscle I gain won’t really affect my balance which is the issue, but being stronger won’t hurt.

I turn on the local Regina news or the Canadian National news because all I see everywhere else is based on what’s going on in America.  Wild fires, hurricanes, Republican National Convention, 184,471 deaths due to Covid-19 in the USA, murder hornets, what stupid thing the President did today, an innocent man shot in the back 7 times by a cop, a 17 year old with an assault rifle shooting into a group of people thinking he’s rightly joining Trump’s henchmen, etc.  Guess what’s on any Canadian news I try to watch?  The same thing.  What are they saying at the RNC?  “WHO WANTS 4 MORE YEARS!!!!”?  I live in Canada & I don’t even want 4 more seconds of what looks like a shit show from here.

Donald Trump didn’t start this.  He also hasn’t/isn’t doing anything to correct it.  He’s sent out an unidentified army to arrest innocent people doing legal peaceful protests while blindly looking away & I’m worried about what people think of me?  Donnie, look in the mirror and wonder what people think of you & what YOU haven’t done……YOUR JOB!


John Petrucci (Dream Theater) & Metallica’s S & M 2 came out today that I was waiting for & a buddy of mine recommended some Rancid (punk music) to me after I asked about this band.


“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Grohl 

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Listen to each other” –Ellen Degeneres


No such thing as a stupid question!  Feel free to ask me on Facebook or the website! links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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Welcome back to the program!  You’re here so if you like what you see, might as well subscribe?  Either on Facebook or with your email in the bottom right corner, it’s really that easy & it’s free!  I know you want to tell your friends, go ahead!


I watched a Netflix mini-series on Friday.  Time off during a pandemic with nowhere to go, while Kim went out with a co-worker to take photos.  I hung out with Brewster, watched a 6 episode mini-series all while practicing stuff on my acoustic guitar.  Roughly 4:30 hours of Netflix.  I watched “Waco” all of it.  Once I started I couldn’t stop.

I was 13 years old when it happened, so I doubt I had much interest in what was on the news all of the time.

What I took away from it worries me about the VERY near future.  What happened in Waco was an unnecessary war.  According to the show, based on two books written by the FBI negotiator & a Waco survivor.  According to the series, the ATF went in firing weapons at the compound.  A cease fire happened for a few months when the FBI took over a few days after the stand-off started.

A deal was reached eventually between David Koresh & the FBI negotiator for a peaceful outcome.  The FBI waited, but not long enough & eventually threw tear gas in starting a fire where many lives were lost.  The series is a completely different story by people that were there involved, compared to what the media was reporting.

Donald Trump has not been able to create a war with another country.  He’s trying REALLY hard in hopes it will win the election for him.  Neither side in Waco admitted their mistakes & look what happened, a war, & from the series it shows that everyone involved has blood on their hands.

Donald Trump will not admit he’s wrong about ANYTHING!  “I’ll be right eventually” well time’s running out along with most people’s patience.

Trump’s using the #blacklivesmatter protests to start a civil war instead.  Donald Trump has unleashed his unmarked Federal Law enforcers on ALL protests.  I see no riots on the news as I did a month ago.  What is he trying to prove by having his soldiers throw people into unmarked vans to be arrested?  The only thing I see is more & more proof that he’s a bully drunk on power.

Unless he admits that he’s wrong I think there is a STRONG chance there will be a war before the election.  The USA will have the same outcome of what happened in Waco, Texas but on a much larger scale.

I’m not saying I’m right or wrong, that’s how I see it as an outsider.

The words of a Pastor……

……not part of the solution.  This is the problem.  This virus could be far less prominent by now, but too many people are thinking this way.

I’m Canadian.  I’m not a Democrat, Republican, Conservative, Liberal, NDP, Green Party, Bloc Quebecois, or People’s Party member/follower.  I vote based on facts not alternative facts.  I believe in God & science.  I believe that EVERYBODY should be treated equally.  I believe in #LGBTQ rights, that #blacklivesmatter, #metoo movement, climate change, universal health care, that diversity is a good thing, the world is BIGGER than America, & not everyone is racist.  I don’t want to hear what the rival politicians can’t do, I want to hear what a politician can do.  I don’t vote base on the party that person is representing.  I vote based on the political party & the politician leading that party.  I’m a human trying to evolve, learn, & be a better person.  No matter what your age is, keep evolving or get left behind.  I’ll help you, but you have to want to evolve.

Now onto the cancer portion.  I’m fine.  I’m in a wheelchair likely for the rest of my life.  I could be bitter about that for the rest of my life but I don’t have time to be bitter.  That would be a HUGE waste of my time & energy.  What bothers me is the ripple effect I’ve created for people in my life, especially Kim.  She has to deal with the fact that I had cancer and am physically disabled because of it EVERYDAY.

This will sound odd, cancer can do whatever it wants to me, but I hate that MY cancer affects the lives of others.  I got cancer, why should anyone else be punished for it?

It’s becoming more apparent to me that I’ll go a few days without much sleep & then crash for 2-3 hours one day in the afternoon.  Once I’m awake & doing stuff, I don’t stop for a rest, I just go from 7:something am until 10 pm or 11 pm, lay awake in bed until 1 or 2 am & repeat for 3 or 4 days until I nap.

Our “niece” was here for a sleepover Saturday night after going shopping & rollerblading with “auntie” Kim.  Hannah will be 7 years old in October.  Winner for most hilarious discussion I heard this weekend…

Kim: Did your parents fill you with sugar before you came over?

Hannah: No, I’m crazy all the time!

I’ve decided there will be no colour change on the guitar I’m saving for.  This is it, as is…

I’ve also decided that I won’t post my playing on social media.  A heckler in a live crowd is something I can manage.  One on social media REALLY singles an individual out.  It’s not like I demo random gear, so I don’t need any feedback, I play for myself.  When I get my guitar, hopefully on August 21st, I’ll get a photo and video unveiling on the Facebook page.  Yeah since ordering it on January 15th, it feels like a long time.  Yep I’m excited/giddy about its arrival.

S2 Custom 22 Semi-Hollow Body Guitar w/Gig Bag - McCarty Sunburst

REALLY good advice!  My guitars are always on a stand or on the wall hangers.  I make a point of practicing some stuff with a metronome.  I never want to oversell myself as a guitar player.  I ask many questions, and I’m always more than willing to answer anything I know about.  I obviously can’t stand up but a strap is on each guitar with a strap lock soon.  A strap for me is an insurance policy if I lose control of the guitar.  Once I’ve figured out the pattern for what I’m playing on the guitar, I repeat it multiple times with my eyes closed & rely on my ears.

Going from playing while seated to playing while standing was very hard for me.  Going from standing, having a hiatus for almost 12 years, & learning to play in a wheelchair was much more difficult, especially since my body naturally wants to move with the music.

I’ve ordered a bunch of beer bottle rubber sealers for guitar strap locks.  They should arrive this month from amazon.  No beer just the sealers for the large bottles that reseal.

The good thing about playing alone is that only I get to decide what to play instead of a band of 3-10 people, that’s also the downside of the situation, not having different influences around you.

I’ll work on these songs for the week while playing other stuff I’ve learned.

Practicing this most of Monday on the 7 string.  It’s the switching between chords into the individually picked notes in the verse that have me practicing so much.

This is just fast & all down picking.  Down picking isn’t a problem, I found an exercise to practice it with a metronome.  I’ve just never played that fast.  This one could take me sometime, just because of how fast it is.

I’ve played this Alter Bridge song before but I don’t remember it.  I’ve got it down as of Monday night, just more repetition needed.

After practicing the Alter Bridge & Trivium songs on Monday, they seem to be easier than I thought.


“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Eric Grohl

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Listen to one another”-Ellen Degeneres


No such thing as a stupid question!  Feel free to ask me on Facebook or the website! links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

Facebook subscription

Email subscription


Welcome back to the program!  You’re here so if you like what you see, might as well subscribe?  Either on Facebook or with your email in the bottom right corner, it’s really that easy & it’s free!  I know you want to tell your friends, go ahead!


What has been on heavy rotation for me lately, “Ghost Reveries” by Opeth, and “One Day Remains” by Alter Bridge.


We headed out of town after Kim was done work on Wednesday, July 15th.  We went to visit her parents, just south of Prince Albert, about a 3:30 hour drive.  It’s actually a hamlet with a population of less than 40 people.  Quiet & very relaxing.  I’d say it’s just as relaxing as my family’s cabin.  I can’t go out to the cabin anymore, it’s not wheelchair accessible in anyway.

Kim’s parents’ place is easier for me to get around in with my wheelchair.  The only issue is that it takes me a lot longer to adapt to my surroundings in a wheelchair.

The biggest issue was in my head.  I was in a VERY relaxed space, but I just felt guilty about not doing something.  I couldn’t stop thinking that I should be exercising, making my week of food, tending to our dishes, etc.

The first 2 of the 3 nights we were there I didn’t sleep well at all for some reason?  We’d go to bed around 10:00 pm every night, but the first 2 nights I was wide awake at 2:20 am then 5:00 am the second night.  I crashed hard for a solid 3 hour nap Friday afternoon & slept really well that night.

Don’t ask me why, my brain just doesn’t stop thinking about what I feel I should be doing.  I still feel as though I’m at least 20 years behind everyone.  I continue to think to myself that I don’t deserve a break since I have so much to do before I can even consider resting.

The only time I feel it’s acceptable to take a break is when Kim has time off, calendar holidays, if I’m sick (which actually feels like a waste of time to me), and when my body just yells at me in pain (another waste of time to me).

Even though I couldn’t feel relaxed, it was nice to go there to see them & Kim’s brother made it for supper on Thursday & Friday.  The bonus were the fresh homemade cinnamon buns!

The entire time we spent there I thought it was me just not being used to my surroundings.  I slept fine Friday night there.  We got home Saturday afternoon & I slept fine Saturday night.  Then comes Sunday night & I barely slept.  Got out of bed around 5:00 am.  Did a few things around the house (quietly), had my breakfast, & finished my exercise by 7:30 am.


When I practice guitar I use a metronome when I do scales & finger exercises.  I play rhythm stuff, so I don’t want the beat to change.  As stated in this video, there are 3 things that make up musicality.  Rhythm, melody, & harmony.  Go to 2:15 minutes in the video to hear what Paul Reed Smith has to say about that…

I’ve found that practicing unplugged REALLY helps, as does practicing on my acoustic guitar (which I need to do more often).  I see a week of Led Zeppelin coming at me!  “Kashmir”, “Whole Lotta Love”, “Houses of the Holy”, & more “Immigrant Song”!

Shipment date for this guitar ordered in January is still set for August 21st 2020.  Feels like a lifetime though!

S2 Custom 22 Semi-Hollow Body Guitar w/Gig Bag - McCarty Sunburst

I’m still saving for this guitar which would arrive 3 months after I place the order or 6 months if they’re backed up still due to the virus.  If everything works out, I hope to order it in the spring.

S2 McCarty 594 Electric Guitar with Gigbag - Whale Blue

I’m hoping an upgrade in paint colour won’t be too much extra, if it is I’ll stick with the ‘Whale Blue’ colour that’s offered.  I’d like it to be in this ‘Violet Blue Burst’ colour.

I’ll stop spending money & hopefully get this amplifier & footswitch in 2022.  Kim tells me to continue saving up for this.  I’d like to get this sooner than later, but I have a decent amplifier to use while I wait a bit.

Quality over quantity.  I am VERY excited for my guitar to get here in August.  Probably looks like just another guitar to most people.  Even the salesman that’s helping me order it from the factory is pretty enthusiastic about it.

Guitar first, then the amplifier & footswitch later on.  This is as long as everything goes as planned & is perfect.  I think we can all agree that the world is far from perfect at the moment.

Definite progress during Monday’s guitar practice on these 2 songs.  Practiced parts of them on my acoustic over the weekend!

I gotta say that not being able to sing has made me attempt more technical guitar parts (to me) that I wouldn’t have even considered before.  I’m really not into solos though.  They just don’t seem as memorable to me.

With the President’s polling numbers are in the gutter, he could turn them around a bit if he’d just do his job & let Dr. Fauci speak as to how to deal with the virus.

I wish Donald Trump would swallow his pride, admit he’s wrong about the Coronavirus at least & help save lives.  Instead he’s done the complete opposite, almost to the point he’s encouraging death to the USA citizens.  Just a sad, screwed up situation.

Please wear a mask in public, practice physical distancing, & listen to health professionals & local government.  EVERYWHERE!!!!


Metallica are set to release their CD & Movie “S&M2” on August 28th (Symphony & Metallica) with the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra.  Here’s the single, a new acoustic song for this occasion.

“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Eric Grohl

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Listen to one another”-Ellen Degeneres

P.S.  I was practicing Monday night unplugged.  I finished up for the evening, I was feeling pretty good about my practice & thought I’d have a small bowl of ice cream while hanging out with Kim.  SHE ATE MY ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I was gonna hold off on buying the amplifier, but that changed instantly, so she told me to have a banana?!  She didn’t care about the amplifier, she ate my Ben & Jerry’s.

NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN A DAY links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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450 Curls w/ 20 pound dumb bells

250 Shoulder raises/Chest presses w/ 10 pound dumb bells

750 Crunches

750 Leg lifts

300 Squats

420 Back flexes

1:20 hours of yoga over 2 days

In the last 3 weeks I have increased every exercise show above other than squats.

A lot of scales, finger exercise, & just using my pinky finger more!  Using my pinky finger for regular power chords instead of my index, middle, & ring finger, like I’ve always done.  Now I have to train my pinky finger to use it in everything!


Welcome back to the program!  You’re here so if you like what you see, might as well subscribe?  Either on Facebook or with your email in the bottom right corner, it’s really that easy & it’s free!  I know you want to tell your friends, go ahead! 


Kim has Thursday & Friday off next week & Wednesday is Canada day!  We have a 5 day weekend next week, so I don’t really want to spend my time on a computer.  I’ll put up a 6 month review of my weight, measurements, & exercises since January 1st for you on Wednesday.

Doctor appointment on Tuesday with my family Dr. just for refills. He told me “It’s good to see you.  You brighten my day”.  Really nice guy, I imagine he’s getting close to retirement.  It’s always good to see him too!  He’s happy to see me doing so well since he became my doctor while I was in the hospital innitially in 2008.  Great guy!

On Wednesdays I notice I feel the fatigue from Monday & Tuesday.  I start to get a little sore & I tend to lay in bed until 8:30 or 9:00.  This week I finally picked up on it, & I was pressed for time.  Practiced guitar for a bit & pulled out DVDs to send to my family cabin, since Netflix isn’t always great out there.  More shelf space now, less clutter.  One of the days when I just don’t have enough time to get everything done.

Well no coffee since Tuesday, May 19th & I don’t even miss it.  Also 1 ounce of alcohol a week or none since then too.  I don’t crave it either, I just need something other than a gallon of water everyday.  Going without that stuff feels great & right from the start I intended, & still do, to make it a permanent change.  This won’t stop after I purchase the amplifier, footswitch, & guitar.

I’m not about to rush out & buy anything right away.  I’ll have money for the amplifier & footswitch before I’ll be able to afford the guitar.  I’d like to have a few hundred dollars saved for the guitar before I get the amplifier & footswitch.  I’m thinking about getting the amplifier & footswitch in February?  After Christmas & my birthday in January, all the while waiting for my guitar ordered in January, expected delay with the virus though, after the innitial delay.

S2 Custom 22 Semi-Hollow Body Guitar w/Gig Bag - McCarty Sunburst

I practice guitar so much now.  I won’t be better than I was necessarily.  I’ll be tecnically a better player, fixing bad habits & other things others won’t notice.  I can’t sing right now, I’m working on guitar stuff, but I’ll still be a rhythm/riff player with more knowledge than before.

I get into our office/guitar room/computer room & I say to myself “OK, 1:30 hours today” then it ends up being almost 3:30 hours Tuesday through Thursday then usually 1:30 more in the evening.  Friday through Monday I can watch my few TV shows whenever.  Ellen Degeneres is watched everyday though!  Late night shows are the next day.

This doesn’t make me feel any better.  He even said, as a devote Republican, he will not vote for Trump or Biden this year.  He said this in an interview with Stephen Colbert after having worked with Donald Trump for 17 months, I think he would know best.

I’m guessing this news is EVERYWHERE & not just in Canada.  The most noticable change should come from the top & filter down.  I hope the peaceful protests continue until there is a change.  I’m not turning this into an anti-Trump site, but we know he’s not going to make a change for the better.  If anything he’s fanning the flames.

As a neighbor to the USA, please vote in November.  Whichever candidate you choose to elect.  If I could vote legally in the USA election, I would.  I can’t being a Canadian but it’s EVERYWHERE.

Ther NEEDS to be a change!  Watching people die for something that should be a slap on the wrist is HORRID.  Black Lives Matter!  This isn’t rocket science, this is humanity, change it.  There’s nothing humane about this situation.  As I ay this know that there are plenty of great police officers.  There’s always a few bad apples that develop a sweeping stereotype though.


“Nothing but Thieves” new album Moral Panic to be released on October 23rd


“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Grohl 

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Listen to each other” –Ellen Degeneres

“I FEEL LIKE SHIT BUT AT LEAST I FEEL SOMETHING” links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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Do you have a question about stage 4 brain cancer?  Ask if you do!

490 Curls w/ 20 pound dumb bells

265 Shoulder raises/Chest presses w/ 10 pound dumb bells

850 Crunches

850 Leg lifts

300 Squats

425 Back flexes

1:00 hour of yoga over 2 days

Played around by extending my repetitions this week, nothing set in stone yet.  I was pissed off this week & pushed things to the maximum.


Learning on guitar “Trivium” the song “The Heart from your Hate”


Welcome back to the program!  You’re here so if you like what you see, might as well subscribe?  Either on Facebook or with your email in the bottom right corner, it’s really that easy & it’s free!  I know you want to tell your friends, go ahead! 


Sorry to start with.  I asked for more subscribers earlier this week and thanks for coming to read this.  Unfortunately this is not a typical happy post.  Bad week that got worse as it went on.  I let too many things influence my mood.  I’ve re-writen this 4 or 5 times but the same stuff comes out in different words.


I’m not a trend setter or influencer, I know that.  That’s really not something I’ve ever been.  I’m a 40 year old physically disabled white male.  About as bland as they come.  I keep my head down & try not to make any waves.  I’m home ALL of the time.  I eat healthy, I exercise 5 days a week, & I practice guitar.  I know I’ve inspired one person to change their life in a positive way, and that’s great!  It’s nice to know this has had a positive impact on someone’s life.

Am I ever going to be able to walk on my own?  I don’t think so, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying.  There are things I can’t do, that gets to me every once in a while.  I can’t help my friends do projects to their house, help them move, if I want to go somewhere I need someone to take me, etc.  I guess I just don’t like not being able to help with things.  I don’t want to be the one that needs help, but if I do, I’m not afraid to ask.

Yeah I know I have a VERY LONG list of things to do that I probably won’t accoplish in my life.  Other people are much further along than I am, yet many seem to think “Hey, he’s doing pretty good” and leave it at that.  I’m not content with myself personally.

I’ve learned that if you’re not trying to better yourself, you’ll likely get left behind.  So I’m trying to make up 4 ½ years I spent living in a hospital that set me back about 30 years or more, I KNOW I have a LOOOOOONG way to go & I feel like Kim & I are being left behind because of me.  The likelyhood of me being nothing more than a statistic becomes more apparent with each passing day.

I watch my local Regina, Saskatchewan news, Canadian national news,  Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Kimmel, & Ellen Degeneres.  On all of them, not nearly as much on Ellen, the majority of the show is about how messed up everything is.  Even on my local news I hear stories such as; this virus is getting worse, too many people aren’t following the social distancing rules because it’s summer & staying home doing nothing is too hard, the murder of George Floyd, Donald Trump enabled this evil & fumbled up this situation, murder hornets, a tornado by my wife’s hometown, a police officer shot an unarmed black man in Atlanta on the weekend after the man was searched and no weapons were found, & climate change denyers.  Did I miss anything?  Oh yeah there was a news story a while ago confirming that UFOs are real, nobody did anything about mass shootings, that topic was just glazed over when the next problem occurred, homelessness, & 3rd World countries, lets keep doing nothing so we can deal with 30 problems at once?  After all of that garbage & the STRONG possibility that Donald Trump will start a war, I stayed in bed on Wednesday & Thursday until 10:00 am, wide awake, tossing & turning & crying.  Today wasn’t any better.

I don’t hate America one bit so don’t get me wrong as I say this please? 

After some research & general knowledge, Canada is WAY different than America.  America has money, power, & Donald Trump.  If I have to pay more, live in a country with weaker influence, live in a colder climate, have health care, not have the same history of racism to NOT live under the “Law & Order” of Donald Trump, I’ll take that any day of the week.  Does Canada have racism among other problems?  YES, but nothing like what’s going on south of the border.  I’ve never read, been taught, or have seen anything like the mess America is dealing with in Canada.

If America is named the “Greatest Country in the World”, the rest of us are waiting & listening, but not much coming out of America is very useful?  I don’t watch Jimmy Kimmel or Stephen Colbert for news that sucks that I’ve already seen.  I watch them to be entertained & maybe have a laugh or 2.  More than ever the wind from America is blowing north to Canada.

I go on social media & people comment about their displeasure with the current American administration.  I state that I’m Canadian, don’t know what it’s like to live there but agree with the statement.  That same random individual will immediately respond telling me to SHUT THE FRONT DOOR or call me a name.  Now people in the USA want Canada’s help??????????????????  WTF??????

I don’t hate America or the people that live there.  I do think that as a country it is HIGHLY over rated though.  Greatness isn’t just rated on wealth & strength.

I watch videos like that & think to myself immediately that “I need to practice WAY  more”!  I already know that he’s WAY ahead of me on guitar.

This is what I do when I change strings of my guitars, always.  You’ve got to take care of them.  I never wipe my strings off until I play them, I always clean the back of the guitar neck when restringing it & most times that I play a guitar.

I’ll be getting rid of a few things for cash that we could use.  My mountain bike that hasn’t been touched since my brother used it for the summer of 2008.  It’s only been used in the city.  Similar to this…

3 guitar effect pedals that I don’t use.  I don’t play live/loudly anymore, so I don’t need them.  Hopefully I can get $50 for each of them since they were $120-$180 new, when I had no other expenses.

After selling/trading that stuff in, I’m pretty sure the guitar & amplifier aren’t going to happen.  I feel like I tried to hard & people are dumbfouded that I want something nice?  I guess I can’t have nice things?  OK, I’ll stay in my lane, I’ll play my role.  Researching & getting excited about the guitar & amplifier was a waste of my time!  I’d rather not have nice material things I enjoy, a $2200 guitar & a $329 amplifier, than be the source of hate for other people.

I don’t have money or influential power, I’m physically disabled.  I’ll help the world by pointing out it’s MANY problems.  Justin Trudeau will throw money at them & Donald Trump will tell everyone lies about how perfect everything is.  I’ll keep an inventory of what issues need to be dealt with & what the new ones coming in are.  Everyone else, wake up the Federal leaders that were elected to do this sort of job.  Wake them up peacefully or they might hide in a bunker & lie about it!

Maybe if I didn’t care so much, I wouldn’t be so INCREDIBLY disappointed?  The news really bummed me out this week.

Sorry to disappoint anyone but there’s also no video of me playing guitar on the Facebook site for this blog.  I did one on Monday & didn’t post it because it was terrible.  I have played hundreds of times before cancer, but not really since.  I’m an idiot!  I’ll post some photos & a video of my ordered guitar when it gets here.  I don’t need a perfectionist to dissect my mediocre guitar playing on social media.  That’s not fun for me.  Maybe on my personal page sometime?  For now I’ll post a video that I watch more often than I should because it’s VERY well done & it makes me smile!


YAY new “Lamb of God” day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Grohl 

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Listen to each other” –Ellen Degeneres


No such thing as a stupid question! Feel free to ask me on Facebook or the website! links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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My left shoulder was incredibly sore on Thursday, no exercise that day, just ice & stretching.


5 day exercise total; 1,500 crunches, 900 leg lifts, 300 squats, 300 back flexes, 0 pushups, 400 curls, 00 tricep lifts, 100 shoulder raises. TONS of stretching & yoga.

I fell asleep to “Into Eternity” the album “Dead or Dreaming”

I exercised to “Kelly Clarkson” the album “Meaning of Life”


I’ve learned that not every diet works for everybody. Sometimes it’s a trend that will work for some, but not others & some people will stick to it for how “Everlong”, some will go back to their regular eating habits & SURPRISE your body will revert to its former shape & size. “In the end” eat what makes YOU feel good & look the way YOU want.

As I say this, please know I’m not calling out/trying to offend anyone. We are often invited elsewhere.
Being a cancer survivor is weird. Initially everyone is really worried, once they think you’re OK people ‘seem’ to forget you exist & revert to their life as it was when you we’re sick & out of the picture. I’m not trying to call out anyone here, I kind of get it. 4 ½ years without the presence of anyone can be completely life changing. Kim & I disappeared for a long time. Now if the phone rings, if Kim gets a text or if I get an email that someone wants to come by we’re shocked. It feels very “isolated” here in a condo & in an odd way I understand. I’ve changed a lot & so have others. Everybody has different priorities now & me having to figure out the lay of the land in a wheelchair isn’t the easiest thing. If I can’t get around a friend’s place, our door is always open, especially if you bring rum! Specifically Bacardi Oakheart spiced rum, Baron Samedi spiced rum or Sangria for Kim, who drinks alcohol far less than me. It’ll take me longer than you think to consume it since it’s on the rocks & not often.

Surviving cancer is weird in many ways. ‘He’s alive, he’s OK, we did our job & saved his life’ maybe that’s what my nurses & therapists thought, & that’s all they were supposed to think, in my mind. Most of them became friends that went beyond their job to help me and they’re all people I have a TON of respect for, current friend or not.

What’s weird here is that after I was in the hospital & the Wascana Rehabilitation Center for an extended period of time, I’m alive & getting better, but we’re missing my full income. That’s not my nurses, therapists or doctors fault. Most things were covered by Canada’s health plan. Our mortgage was covered for 2 years. Rent for my room at WRC was $1000/month & not covered by anything. You need money to survive. My wife works a full 8 hour day, 5 days a week. I collect disability until I’m 65 and CPP for the rest of my life. Together they don’t amount to $28,000 a year. If there was a box on the ballot to check off for politicians to comprehend that, it would have been marked with my vote. I didn’t have that option & no candidate spoke about it. From what I can tell, people with extended term disabilities in the public are forgotten about by politicians. That makes no sense to me at all? So I’m a financial burden whether I like it or not? “Life’s not fair you idiot! Lighten up!” So because I’m not physically strong enough to get a job, I’m forgotten & I should be happy with that while being a burden too? No, I’m sorry, that’s not good enough! I don’t want to be a burden & forgotten. I’m sure I’m not the only one in this type of situation either. Because of cancer I have created many bad/unwanted/uncommon ripple effects. I don’t understand that? I do plan to get an online part time job in the future & contribute to society & earn a small paycheck.

The left brake on my free wheelchair broke multiple times & after 2 or 3 separate times Sask. Abilities weren’t able to fix it properly for $50 each time. I got a different chair for just over $7,000 and $1000 of that was covered by our government & they’ll cover it once in a life time. The rest of it was paid out of pocket. My parents & Grandparents have helped out immensely with these expenses, I don’t want to go back to the well. I researched & I voted to see if maybe the Canadian Government would change, it didn’t. So for the next 4 years I get to be alive but not live?

I’m not someone looking for a handout of cash, this is my life & I guess I have to deal with it. I don’t want the Government to just fix my situation, just level the playing field a bit for everyone. I have a retirement disability savings plan. I can put in $5000 a year I think & it triples the amount. I can’t touch that money that I deposit for 10 years. So I’ll have some money in 9 years, until then my wife & I get to live as is & not do much of anything? Prices have gone up with inflation, I would think my salary would have as well, I’m not looking to be rich, I would like to make an income closer to what I was at when I passed out “in the meantime”.

I was head hunted by a different company & got a significant raise to stay where I was. I had some other issues with how the other company was being managed as well. I’m glad I stayed where I was, the other place no longer exists. I don’t know if they thought I could improve their chances of staying afloat? I was the youngest employee where I was, running 1 of the 2 larger printing presses where I was though.

I’m not going to be the poster boy for this, but I will support this cause. I’m not a person that gets into politics. I don’t like messing around in politics and I plan to stay away from it. That being said, I did send an email to the Canadian Federal Government asking about this issue. I got cancer, & it’s nobody’s fault. I’m not looking to get rich, I’m looking to make a similar wage as I made before I got cancer.

If you’re Canadian & want to voice your opinion on anything, this is the Governments website

There are people FAR worse off than I am & nobody pays attention to them, but that’s supposed to be ‘Not our problem’? A TON of people want food, water, & shelter. Why have I been whining about my situation for so long? They’re other people who are worse off than the rest of us.

What do I not like? Whiners, complainers, fake people & people who don’t do their job at a respectable level. I’m certain I am all of those things, but fake, on this post & the entire website. I guess that long road to recovery is longer than I thought. Call me whatever you want to, but don’t call me fake. I can handle whatever you throw at me other than fake.

I hear we may have out of town guests this weekend that would be FANTASTIC!

I use streaming music until the funds are there to purchase music on iTunes or CD. I personally refuse to attain music by streaming it. Same deal with texting & photos. I do not like either one of them, so owning a cell phone would make me a hypocrite in my eyes.

Like them or not a cell phone can be VERY distracting at times.


9 albums streaming right now, not cool with me. Hello iTunes, slowly, next year! Any streaming service could tank at any moment and I’d be left with nothing, that’s why I use iTunes, a minimal paying site.


I just found out about this band the other day. 4 albums in total, instrumental progressive rock (they’re classified as metal but call me jaded) with a couple of classical guitar & orchestral tracks too. I’ve never heard music like this! I grabbed their newest album on a streaming platform for a future purchase “The Zenith Rise”…


If you’re getting this through Facebook, give it a like or other reaction, or share it. That’s the only way of promoting this site, since I’m not profiting from this in any way.

“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Grohl

We’re all Global Citizens,

“Be kind to one another”-Ellen Degeneres


No such thing as a stupid question!  Feel free to ask me on Facebook or the website!  links are there for a point of reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about.

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Do you have a question about stage 4 brain cancer?  Ask if you do!

Music throughout the weekend.  “The Cure” X 2, “Big Wreck”, “Jimmy Eat World”, “Alter Bridge”

I thought the “Big Wreck” album “…but for the sun” was my favourite Big Wreck album.  It quickly became one of my favourite albums overall, the new Alter Bridge is very close to that as well….and it was just released on Friday!


I stated this on Friday “Ideally we’d be moving into our new house by mid-November, but it’s been purchased, we can’t change that, just move on & keep doing our thing.”  This is not correct.  Today it is closer to correct.

Ideally we’d have gotten our dream home & be moving in November 2nd & 3rd.  That’s not happening, since we have nowhere to move to.  We’re looking but wheelchair accessibility in a house is rare in a smaller city.  It may be out there, but it has to be good enough to make it accessible on a budget.

I was feeling guilty for the lack of exercise last week, so I did 300 crunches, 200 curls, 50 shoulder raises, & some yoga.  Brewster was at daycare on Friday.  He came home a little grubby & needed a bath.  He was really tired after daycare, as usual.

The Riders won their game Friday night, 2 games left in the regular season & a Western final home game isn’t out of the question……………..yet.

Well Saturday was a relaxing morning.  Kim got up way too early to clean the car in the garage after making a trip to Tim Hortons for her coffee.  Late in the afternoon we saw another nice house that was so not wheelchair accessible.  That’s 4 or 5 swing & misses now.  I assume that number will grow exponentially.  Great neighbourhood, really nice place, but very little room for me to get around.  We’re looking, it’s hiding somewhere?

Kim’s aunt & 2 cousins were spending the night at Kim’s sister’s place in town.  We went over for supper and a visit before they head home to Alberta in the morning.  Of course on the way home we pass a Tim Hortons!  I don’t think Kim can go past one without getting a tea or coffee, I should’ve told here I had to pee!

We got home around 9:30 pm.  We watched the last 3 episodes of “The Ranch” season 7 on Netflix.  WOW if there was ever a cliff hanger for the next season that was it!  I stayed up until shortly after 1:00 am desperately searching for a house on I found some possibilities, but none of those have worked out so far.  If only stairs & steps weren’t my nemesis.  Me, defeated by a 6” step!

Alice Cooper is coming to Regina Monday, April 13th, 2020.  Tickets went on sale on Friday, & somehow there are no wheelchair seats left.  I find that odd, that’s the only bonus to being in a wheelchair!  Wheelchair seating never sells out, at ANY venue.

Sunday evening was more house shopping online.  Kim wants an attached garage with a direct door from the garage to the house.  We both know I need wheelchair accessibility.  I’d like a back deck I can get onto & let Brewster hang out outside.  12 online possibilities, 0 worth looking at!  Attached garage seems to be the biggest issue.  There are attached garages, but the entrance to the house is either the front or back door?

Monday is Kim’s day off before her actual birthday “Kim & Chris’ Day of Fun!”

Just the “DAY OF FUN!” is true.  Kim’s cool, do you think I’d be married to her for almost 15 years if she wasn’t?

Quiet day.  Kim didn’t feel much like venturing out & unless you like to eat & drink, there’s not much to do on a week day in Regina.  We took Brewster to daycare, went out to a local coffee shop, voted, came home & shopped online for houses to look at.  We found 3 in total, I think 2 of them are financial pipe dreams but are also move in ready.  Kim wants to look at them & see what they’d cost us though, looking can’t hurt I guess?  Out of the 12 I found online in our price range, Kim approved of 1.  It’s one of those ones that will be fine as is, but we could make it better.

Kim seems to make large purchases on her birthday, we’ll see if she repeats that again.  I might be living on macaroni………………….cheese is far too fancy!!!!!!!!!!!!!


If you’re getting this through Facebook, give it a like or other reaction.  That’s the only way of promoting this site, since I’m not profiting from this in any way.

“I feel good about the good things, & bad about the bad things”-David Grohl

We’re all Global Citizens,


“Be kind to one another”-Ellen Degeneres


Kim has Monday off since Tuesday is her actual birthday.  Which means I get to do girl stuff at Kim’s favourite places.  This also means no weekend update until Monday evening.  Oh yay we get to vote that day too!  I’m trying to be positive about that.

Take care & I’ll catch ya on Monday,