Thursday, September 25th 2014

I got up at this time with zero sleep. Didn’t want to disturb Kim with me getting in & out of bed for just a burp that I thought might turn into me vomiting.

That’s why this site even exists in the first place. Not much music stuff today, if at all. I’m sick. First time I’ve thrown up since my vomiting 5 times a day in 2008 & 2009. Vomiting in the middle of the Southland Mall food court while drinking a Booster Juice is SO not cool! I highly don’t recommend it, to anyone.

Why did I come out of brain cancer like the biggest moron ever? I’m not about to hide behind “Ooohh, I had stage 4 brain cancer & 3 emergency brain surgeries”. That would be a lame & cowardly excuse! The real reason is this, I’M A CONTROL FREAK, plain & simple. I went through a situation that I had no control of. I don’t want to spin this as a poor me pity party. I was looking for someone or an entire group to blame. Even sleeping in the hospital for the majority of 2008 I remember a very vivid dream. In my dream I asked Kim to take over for a day or two, since I needed a break. This was in the hospital. I hadn’t even started the recovery/rehabilitation part of it, the really hard part.

I don’t like talking about my cancer, but it’s 4.5 years of Kim & my life as a married couple now just over 9 years in. That’s half of our marriage spent in 3 different hospitals. I think that number means more to Kim than I? For me, it feels like a lifetime ago.

I never really practiced anything. If I wasn’t half decent at it, then I just wouldn’t do it! I think at the age of 4, I went to one T-ball practice and one game and I asked my parents to put me in “real” baseball. If you knocked the hitting T down, you were automatically out. I thought that rule was terrible. I went to baseball. Pitching machines and a fielder next to it, to act as the pitcher on the field.

Now I’m 34+ and get to……………ugh………………practice EVERYTHING! I hate practicing standing, walking, stairs, cooking, drinking anything with carbonation, eating without coughing, even guitar, etc. It’s just not fun it’s “work”. The only thing I ever “worked” at was chemistry class. High school and University of Regina. Other than that I breezed through life. Sure I was teased & made fun of at school but that is SO far in the past. I couldn’t wait to graduate high school and get a fresh start. Truth be told, I didn’t want to be there in the first place really. That’s why I look so happy in the yearbook at the after grad party.

I’ll catch you tomorrow! I’m going to watch some TV & hopefully fall asleep on the couch as I sweat!

If you want music news check out “The Needle Drop” & the “Rock It Out Blog”

Why did this turn into a music blog? Because “music is a BIG @#$%#$& deal”-Dave Grohl
“Learn something from your mistakes and don’t do them again”
“I feel good about the good things and bad about the bad things”-David Eric Grohl
“Hubby Boo Boo” aka “Butthead” aka Christopher or Chris G. Fraser on facebook


2 responses to “CANCER

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